Where are you spending it? Is it on what you actually want to be doing? If it's not, what is the cost to the areas of your life where you do want to focus?
These are by no means easy questions to answer. Sometimes it's through a lack of awareness, and sometimes through a lack of self-honesty.
I do believe that you can find balance and harmony in life. Things can coexist. But I think the fallout happens when the friction is high. Attending that dinner you don't really want to go to, going to a job you don't find purposeful or fulfilling, running a race that means nothing to you.
Society has a way of talking to us, and we listen. Often, it's for the greater good. Living in a nice society and community is pleasant. We like to belong. We need to belong. But there's also an underlying hum of expectation that tells us things need to be the way they've always been.
From having the house, the car, the kids, to showing up to everything for everyone else.
Of course, not everything that takes energy is necessarily a bad thing. Some of the most meaningful parts of life require effort, commitment and sacrifice. The distinction is whether that energy is being spent on something that matters to you, or simply maintaining something because you feel you should
The problem I see is that it takes energy to keep showing up in spaces that no longer serve you. In fact, it can take more energy than it used to, because you're approaching them from below zero.
Working on a project that no longer brings you the joy it once did, or continuing to commit to things that no longer align with you, slowly drains you.
Combine enough of these below-zero moments over time, and all of a sudden you're turning up exhausted to the areas of your life where you actually want to thrive.
Life doesn't need to be an all-or-nothing approach. We don't need to be 100% invested in one area; that's not sustainable. But life is more pleasant when we're true to our authentic selves. When our energy is more appropriately distributed across the areas that matter most to us.
So perhaps find a moment to sit with a coffee and audit your week.
What drained you? What filled your cup? What no longer serves you? And what brought you the most joy?
Nothing will change overnight, but the life you love exists by design.
